50+ Mermaid Jokes
Mermaid jokes, ocean fantasy humor, and sea-salted punchlines.
- Dad, are mermaids fish or women? -It depends on if you are horny or hungry.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward '- Dad, are mermaids fish or women?', then the trigger '-It depends on if you are horny or hungry.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
An old man walks into a bar... ...and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a tennis ball. "I have to ask, sir," says the bartender. "Without sounding rude, what happened to your head?" The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid." "That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?" "Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'An old man walks into a bar... ...and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a tennis bal...', then the trigger '."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because she is too big for B-shells
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the little mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because she is too big for B-shells' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What did the mermaid forget to bring to math class? Her algae bra
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the mermaid forget to bring to math class?', then the trigger 'Her algae bra' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Three men are walking along the beach... Three men are walking along the beach of a tropical island when they encounter a lone mermaid. The mermaid seems friendly, and the men are amazed at seeing this beautiful woman, so they strike up a conversation with her. Eventually, the first man asks "Have you ever been kissed before?" "No," responds the mermaid. So the first man kisses her, and she enjoys it. The second man then asks "Have you ever had your breasts fondled before?" "Oh, my, no!" says the mermaid, clearly embarrassed. The second man then convinces her to allow him to fondle her breasts, and she enjoys it also. Finally, the third man says to the mermaid "have you ever been fucked before?" "Oh, goodness, no!", the mermaid says, her face bright red from embarrassment. The third man responds, "Well, you are now, the tide's out."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Three men are walking along the beach... Three men are walking along the beach of a tropical island when they encount...', then the trigger 'The third man responds, "Well, you are now, the tide's out."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because B shells are too small and D shells are too big.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because B shells are too small and D shells are too big.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
WALKS INTO A BAR... MERMAID SEX An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball. "I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?" The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid." "That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?" "Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'WALKS INTO A BAR... MERMAID SEX An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head i...', then the trigger '."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why was the mermaid wearing seashells? The B shells were too small.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the mermaid wearing seashells?', then the trigger 'The B shells were too small.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
A Little Head A man walks into a bar and notices the gentleman next to him has a very small head. After a few beers, he finally asks the gentleman, "Pardon me, but why is your head so small?". The man began to explain how he was in the Navy and after his ship was struck by a torpedo, and he was stuck on a deserted island for months. "One day," he said "A mermaid magically appeared. She said she could grant any wish I had. I asked to be rescued, and off in the horizon, I saw a coast guard ship heading towards me. I then proceeded to explain how long I had been stuck on the island and asked her for some sex before being rescued. She explained that it was impossible since she was a mermaid. So instead, I asked her for a little head."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A Little Head A man walks into a bar and notices the gentleman next to him has a very small head. After a few beers,...', then the trigger 'So instead, I asked her for a little head."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells for a bra? Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells for a bra?', then the trigger 'Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why did the mermaid cover her breasts with seashells? She outgrew her B shells.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the mermaid cover her breasts with seashells?', then the trigger 'She outgrew her B shells.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because D-shells are too big and B-shells are too small.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because D-shells are too big and B-shells are too small.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell *im so sorry*
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell', then the trigger '*im so sorry*' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
An English Man, An Irish Man, and a Scots Man all go to the beach... As they walk along the sand they see a Mermaid laid up on the rocks, the waves crashing around her. They are all struck by her beauty but are initially scared to approach. The English Man finally does and strikes up a conversation. As they talk he realises she is totally inexperienced with human interaction. "So have you ever been kissed?" "No never, but I'd love to try it" She answered shyly. So he gives her a long passionate kiss. He walks away, content, but the Scots man overhearing this realises the opportunity. "So have you ever given a blow job?" "No never, could you teach me?" With tentative instruction the Scots man guides her through the best blowjob of his life. He leaves satisfied and happy. By this time many hours have passed and the Irish man finally approaches the Mermaid. "So, have you ever been fucked?" "No, never" She whispered with anticipation. "Well you are now: the tides gone out."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'An English Man, An Irish Man, and a Scots Man all go to the beach... As they walk along the sand they see a Mermaid l...', then the trigger '"Well you are now: the tides gone out."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
An old man walks into a bar.... And orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball. "I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?" The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid." "That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?" "Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'An old man walks into a bar.... And orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball. "I...', then the trigger '"Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does the Little Mermaid wear sea shells? Because D shells are too big and B shells are too small.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the Little Mermaid wear sea shells?', then the trigger 'Because D shells are too big and B shells are too small.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why did the mermaid wear sea shells? Cause she was too big for B- shells! (my 6 year old niece likes to tell this joke)
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the mermaid wear sea shells? Cause she was too big for B- shells!', then the trigger '(my 6 year old niece likes to tell this joke)' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
The mermaid joke The guy that has only one testicle was swimming in the pond and all of a sudden someone grabs him from his testicle. He looks down and sees a mermaid is holding his ball. Then mermaid asks: plus 1 or minus 1? The shocked and scared guy says: plus 1. Tge mermaid lets him go and swims away. The guy comes out of the water and realizes he has 2 balls! He goes and tells the story to his friends. One of his friends has 2 missing fingers, so he desides to go to the pond the next morning and try his luck. He is swimming in the pond and all of a sudden someone grabs him from his testicles. He looks down and sees a mermaid is holding his balls. Then mermaid asks: plus 2 or minus 2? The happy guy responds: Plus 2! After coming out of the water he realizes that he has 4 testicles! He doesn't know what to do and after spending the whole night thinking comes up with a plan of going back the next morning and just answering minus 2 this time. So he's swimming in the pond and all of a sudden the mermaid grabs him by his balls and asks: plus 4 or minus 4? Edited: grammar
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The mermaid joke The guy that has only one testicle was swimming in the pond and all of a sudden someone grabs him fr...', then the trigger 'Edited: grammar' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do math and mermaids have in common? They both have an alge-bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do math and mermaids have in common?', then the trigger 'They both have an alge-bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells? Because B-shells are too small, and D-shells are too big.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because B-shells are too small, and D-shells are too big.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why did the Little Mermaid run away with the fisherman? He had allure.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the Little Mermaid run away with the fisherman?', then the trigger 'He had allure.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because D-shells are too big and B- shells are too small. *A random elderly woman just stopped in the street in front off where I was sitting and told me this. Awesome*
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because D-shells are too big and B- shells are too small. *A random elderly woman jus...', then the trigger 'Awesome*' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is absurdism.
What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common? They're both under DC.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common?', then the trigger 'They're both under DC.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the mermaid wear SeaShells? Because she outgrew her B-Shells. Ha...
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the mermaid wear SeaShells? Because she outgrew her B-Shells.', then the trigger 'Ha...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because D shells are too big.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the little mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because D shells are too big.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
How do mermaids have babies? Sea-sections
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How do mermaids have babies?', then the trigger 'Sea-sections' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
How does a mermaid give birth? By sea-section!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How does a mermaid give birth?', then the trigger 'By sea-section!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the mermaid wear to her math class? An algae bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the mermaid wear to her math class?', then the trigger 'An algae bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A man with an extremely little head meets his friend at a bar for a few drinks... his friend says what the hell happened to your head? The man says he found a mermaid who agreed to grant him three wishes. With his first wish he asked for a billion dollars and the mermaid granted this wish. With his second wish he asked to live a healthy a fulfilling life and the mermaid got him into the best shape of his life. His friend asks what about the third wish? The man replies, well this mermaid was really good looking so I asked her to have sex with me for my third wish. The problem was that mermaids don't have vaginas, so I asked her for a little head.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A man with an extremely little head meets his friend at a bar for a few drinks... his friend says what the hell happe...', then the trigger 'The problem was that mermaids don't have vaginas, so I asked her for a little head.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She grew out of her b-shells.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'She grew out of her b-shells.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why do mermaids wear sea shells? Because they can't fit in d-shells. Edit: re wording
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear sea shells? Because they can't fit in d-shells.', then the trigger 'Edit: re wording' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Two fishermen caught a mermaid. One of them holding the mermaid in his arms looked at her attentively and threw her back into the sea. But why? - asked the other fisherman. But how? - answered the first one.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Two fishermen caught a mermaid. One of them holding the mermaid in his arms looked at her attentively and threw her b...', then the trigger '- answered the first one.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Was The Little Mermaid directed by a pilot? Because it's mostly Ariel footage.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Was The Little Mermaid directed by a pilot?', then the trigger 'Because it's mostly Ariel footage.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What does a Mermaid bring to math class? An algae-bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does a Mermaid bring to math class?', then the trigger 'An algae-bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why does the little mermaid wear sea-shells? She grew out of her b-shells
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does the little mermaid wear sea-shells?', then the trigger 'She grew out of her b-shells' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Wat did the mermaid wear to her math exam? An algae-bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Wat did the mermaid wear to her math exam?', then the trigger 'An algae-bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What does a mermaid mathematicion wear? An Algae-bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does a mermaid mathematicion wear?', then the trigger 'An Algae-bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Mermaid Sex An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy’s head is the size of a cue ball. “I got to ask, sir,” says the bartender. “What happened?” The old guy sighs and tells him, “My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid.” “That doesn’t sound too bad,” says the bartender. “Then what happened?” “Well,” sighs the man, “mermaids can’t have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head… .”
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Mermaid Sex An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy’s head is the size of a cue...', then the trigger '“Well,” sighs the man, “mermaids can’t have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head… .”' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
(Corny)-What do you call a mermaid on a roof? Aerial
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward '(Corny)-What do you call a mermaid on a roof?', then the trigger 'Aerial' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
When Ariel the mermaid gives a blowjob to Prince Eric... is that Fellate Of Fish?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'When Ariel the mermaid gives a blowjob to Prince Eric...', then the trigger 'is that Fellate Of Fish?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why does Ariel the Mermaid wear seashells? She grew out of her B - shells!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why does Ariel the Mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'She grew out of her B - shells!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Manatees A Spanish sailor and a French sailor are talking at a port bar together. The French sailor tells the Spanish sailor that he's been hearing stories of mermaids from the English sailors. The Spanish sailor says that mermaids are just a myth and the English just mistook manatees for mermaids. The French sailor asks how could you mistake a manatee for a mermaid? The Spanish sailor responds "Have you seen English women?"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Manatees A Spanish sailor and a French sailor are talking at a port bar together. The French sailor tells the Spanish...', then the trigger 'The Spanish sailor responds "Have you seen English women?"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
I asked my daughter's dentist for her favorite joke. Was not disappointed. What is the latest fad among teenage mermaids in the city of Atlantis? Taking shellfies with their shellphones.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'I asked my daughter's dentist for her favorite joke. Was not disappointed. What is the latest fad among teenage merma...', then the trigger 'Taking shellfies with their shellphones.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Thinking about making a sitcom where two mermaid guys are roommates and calling it "tuna half men"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Thinking about making a sitcom where two mermaid guys are roommates', then the trigger 'and calling it "tuna half men"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
So my brother is dating a mermaid. Yeah, apparently their relationship's on the rocks.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'So my brother is dating a mermaid.', then the trigger 'Yeah, apparently their relationship's on the rocks.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
The Small Skulled Boss (nsfw) So, I'd been working at my company for a while (I won't say which one, but you probably have used their product today). Yesterday, the CEO of the company came into our department and had a sit down with me. When I first met him, the first thing I noticed was the size of his head. It was the size of a baby's head. It was all I could do to keep from staring. After our meeting, he invited me and my co-workers out for drinks and after about six shots I finally got the courage to ask him about his tiny noggin. He laughs and says "You caught me in a good mood. I will tell you the story. About ten years ago I was fishing in the Gulf of Mexico all by myself and I caught myself a mermaid. She told me that if I let her go, she would give me three wishes. I, of course, let her go. I asked to be a rich man as my first wish and she made me the CEO of this company. I asked to have luck with the ladies whenever I wanted. In retrospect that was a wasted wish because the money takes care of that anyways. Well, the problem came with my third wish. I asked to fuck her and she said 'I would, but unfortunately, I am not equipped for that,' to which I replied......... How about a little head?"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The Small Skulled Boss (nsfw) So, I'd been working at my company for a while (I won't say which one, but you probably...', then the trigger 'How about a little head?"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is superiority.
How did the mermaid prostitute make all her money? Blue whales
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How did the mermaid prostitute make all her money?', then the trigger 'Blue whales' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
The man with the small head. A boy was walking down the road when he noticed an old timer with an unusually small head. The curious boy walked up to the bloke and said, "Hey mister! Why the heck is your head so small?" The old man looked at the boy and replied, "Boy, if I wasn't so damn old, I'd give you a beating... but since you remind me of myself at your age, I will tell you..." The boy listened curiously as the man explained, "One day I was fishing off the jetty when I got a huge bite. And I said to myself, 'Holy shit! I must've caught a whale!'" "No kidding?" pried the boy. "But, when I reeled it up," the man continued, "to my surprise, it was a *gorgeous* mermaid! Well, she was absolutely petrified when she saw me and said she'd grant me one wish if I let her free..." "And?" interjected the boy. "Well, after some quick thought, I looked at her and said, 'How 'bout a little head?'"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The man with the small head. A boy was walking down the road when he noticed an old timer with an unusually small hea...', then the trigger '"Well, after some quick thought, I looked at her and said, 'How 'bout a little head?'"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What does a mermaid wear to math class? An "algebra"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does a mermaid wear to math class?', then the trigger 'An "algebra"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
BOY: Dad , is a mermaid girl or a fish ? DAD : Well son that depends weather you are HORNY or HUNGRY .
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'BOY: Dad , is a mermaid girl or a fish ?', then the trigger 'DAD : Well son that depends weather you are HORNY or HUNGRY .' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Was told to turn on the water hose I was told to turn on the water hose. Responded "I don't know anything about mermaid sexuality"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Was told to turn on the water hose I was told to turn on the water hose. Responded', then the trigger '"I don't know anything about mermaid sexuality"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
A sailor walked into a bar with a shrunken head... He sat down as all the other seafaring folk all stared in silence at the size of this mans tiny skull. He pulled up a stool and ordered a pint. Curiosity got the better of one of the other men and he just had to ask "what happened to your head?" "Ah I was out on my own fishing for months out in the middle of god knows where, one morning at dawn amongst the mist I spot a mermaid upon a rock. I couldn't believe my eyes. She said she'd grant me one wish, she would do anything I wanted. The very next day I find myself talking to ye folk." "Yes but what happened? What did you ask for?" .... "I said all I wanted was a little head."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A sailor walked into a bar with a shrunken head... He sat down as all the other seafaring folk all stared in silence...', then the trigger '"I said all I wanted was a little head."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because the B shells were too small and the D shells were too big.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the mermaid wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because the B shells were too small and the D shells were too big.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What did the lobster say when he saw the mermaid? Gotta lay off the sea-weed.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the lobster say when he saw the mermaid?', then the trigger 'Gotta lay off the sea-weed.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do you call a slutty mermaid? An H2hoe
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a slutty mermaid?', then the trigger 'An H2hoe' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? *wait for it* Because they grew out of their B-shells!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells?', then the trigger '*wait for it* Because they grew out of their B-shells!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
So, the day little Johnny is turning 12, his dad asks him the following question... "Little Johnny, do you know how babies are born?" The little boy, scared, answers immediately: "I don't wanna know! Please promise you won't tell me, dad!!!" The dad is really nonplussed, confused, and asks him: "But why in the world don't you want to know, Johnny?" Johnny, hiccuping and sobbing: "When I turned six, I was told the Easter bunny wasn't real. When I turned eight, I found out there are no such things as fairy godparents, mermaids or wizards. At ten, I found out that Santa was you. If now I find out adults don't fuck, I don't see any reason to keep on living!!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'So, the day little Johnny is turning 12, his dad asks him the following question... "Little Johnny, do you know how b...', then the trigger 'If now I find out adults don't fuck, I don't see any reason to keep on living!!"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because their boobs are too big for b-shells.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells?', then the trigger 'Because their boobs are too big for b-shells.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What do nerdy mermaids wear? Algae-bras
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do nerdy mermaids wear?', then the trigger 'Algae-bras' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
How do we know a blind man created mermaids? He smelled the bottom half of a woman..
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How do we know a blind man created mermaids?', then the trigger 'He smelled the bottom half of a woman..' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the comedian mermaid die ? Because it had a dry sense of humor .
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the comedian mermaid die ?', then the trigger 'Because it had a dry sense of humor .' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear bras? To cover up their Ariel-as.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear bras?', then the trigger 'To cover up their Ariel-as.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
THE MERMAID WHY DID THE MERMAID WEAR SEASHELLS? BECAUSE SHE GREW OUT OF HER B-SHELLS !!! BADA BUM !!!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'THE MERMAID WHY DID THE MERMAID WEAR SEASHELLS? BECAUSE SHE GREW OUT OF HER B-SHELLS !!!', then the trigger 'BADA BUM !!!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
How did the mermaid get into a car crash? ...because she was fish tailing!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How did the mermaid get into a car crash?', then the trigger '...because she was fish tailing!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A man with a tiny head walks into a bar A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the man's head is the size of a cue ball. "I've got to ask sir" says the bartender. "What happened?" The man says "my ship was sunk, a mermaid rescued me and promised me three wishes. For my first wish I asked to be returned to America. My second wish was to have a billion dollars. Finally, I asked to have sex with her, but she said mermaids can't have sex, so I asked for a little head!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A man with a tiny head walks into a bar A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the man's hea...', then the trigger 'Finally, I asked to have sex with her, but she said mermaids can't have sex, so I asked for a little head!"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why did the mermaid rush out of her maths exam, red faced and embarrassed? Because her algaebra didn't hold up.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the mermaid rush out of her maths exam, red faced and embarrassed?', then the trigger 'Because her algaebra didn't hold up.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
the three Paddys Three blokes, all named Paddy, are down by the seashore one day when they spot a mermaid off in the distance. The English Paddy says to his mates "watch this". He saunters over to the mermaid and asks "Excuse me, have you ever been kissed before?" She replies "Why no", whereupon he proceeds to kiss her. She giggles excitedly, flattered. The English Paddy comes back to his mates to gloat. The Scottish Paddy then says, "That's nothing, watch this", whereupon HE slides over to the mermaid to ask "Excuse me, have you ever had your breasts fondled before?". She giggles shyly again and responds "Why no!", whereupon he proceeds to fondle her breasts. She responds excitedly and laughs. The Scottish Paddy heads back to his mates to recant the experience. The Irish Paddy responds saying "That's nothing, watch this." He now sidles over to the mermaid and asks "Excuse me, have you ever been FUCKED before?" She exclaims "Why no!" Whereupon the Irish Paddy says "Well you have now, because the tide has gone out!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'the three Paddys Three blokes, all named Paddy, are down by the seashore one day when they spot a mermaid off in the...', then the trigger 'The Irish Paddy responds saying "That's nothing, watch this." He now sidles over to the mermaid and asks "Excuse me,...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What does a math mermaid wear? An algeabra....
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does a math mermaid wear?', then the trigger 'An algeabra....' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the mermaid forget to bring to the maths lesson? Her algae bra.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the mermaid forget to bring to the maths lesson?', then the trigger 'Her algae bra.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
slight variation on an arguable classic: How do mermaids reproduce? Binary fish-ion.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'slight variation on an arguable classic: How do mermaids reproduce?', then the trigger 'Binary fish-ion.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why was the mermaid embarrassed and crying in the classroom? She forgot her Algae-bra. Ha..
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the mermaid embarrassed and crying in the classroom? She forgot her Algae-bra.', then the trigger 'Ha..' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the mermaid wear for good luck on her math test? Her *algaebra*.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the mermaid wear for good luck on her math test?', then the trigger 'Her *algaebra*.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What swims slightly faster than a shark? The Little Mermaid on her period.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What swims slightly faster than a shark?', then the trigger 'The Little Mermaid on her period.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells? because D shells dont fit
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells?', then the trigger 'because D shells dont fit' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Small head A guy walks into a bar with a head the size of a grapefruit. The bartender walks over and asks what happened, why is his head so small. The guy says for free drinks I'll tell you the story so the bartender gives him free drinks for the night. The guy starts his story, I was in the Navy and about 10 years ago my small ship hit a reef and all hands were lost but me, standing on the reef. After about a week when I was almost dead a mermaid popped up out of the water feeling sorry for me. She said I could have 3 wishes so I said I want a fancy yacht on its way to get me. She points to the horizon and here it comes. Then I said I want 100 million dollars on the yacht she said granted. Then I said I've been out to sea for a long time i havent had sex for a while. How about you come up on this reef with me and have sex. She said I'm a fish from the waist down I can't, then I said how about a little head?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Small head A guy walks into a bar with a head the size of a grapefruit. The bartender walks over and asks what happen...', then the trigger 'She said I'm a fish from the waist down I can't, then I said how about a little head?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
A joke about mermaids and humans: If human pussy smells like fish, does mermaid pussy smell like human?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A joke about mermaids and humans:', then the trigger 'If human pussy smells like fish, does mermaid pussy smell like human?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
mermaid procreation how does a mermaid give birth? sea section
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'mermaid procreation how does a mermaid give birth?', then the trigger 'sea section' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why was the lesbian mermaid fired from the bakery? She was eating all the muff-fins.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the lesbian mermaid fired from the bakery?', then the trigger 'She was eating all the muff-fins.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What font belongs in Little Mermaid? Ariel.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What font belongs in Little Mermaid?', then the trigger 'Ariel.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is wordplay with incongruity-resolution.
What does a mermaid stoner smoke? Seaweed.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does a mermaid stoner smoke?', then the trigger 'Seaweed.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What lives in the sea and preys on mermaids? Jack The Kipper.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What lives in the sea and preys on mermaids?', then the trigger 'Jack The Kipper.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why do mermaids wear seashells for bras? Because B-shells are to small and D-shells are to big.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why do mermaids wear seashells for bras?', then the trigger 'Because B-shells are to small and D-shells are to big.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What kind of pictures does a mermaid take on her phone? Shelfies.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What kind of pictures does a mermaid take on her phone?', then the trigger 'Shelfies.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Q: What's a little quicker than a shark? A: The Little Mermaid on her period.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Q: What's a little quicker than a shark?', then the trigger 'A: The Little Mermaid on her period.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
How do African mermaids cover their breasts? They use sea bras.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How do African mermaids cover their breasts?', then the trigger 'They use sea bras.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the pirate date the mermaid? He thought finding X in her algebra would lead to booty.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the pirate date the mermaid?', then the trigger 'He thought finding X in her algebra would lead to booty.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A Man's Three Wishes An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender can't help but noticing the guy's head is the size of a cue ball. "I gotta ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?" The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid." "That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?" "Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A Man's Three Wishes An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender can't help but noticing the guy's h...', then the trigger '."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Pirate ship Why did the pirate carve a topless mermaid into the front of his ship? Yar, cause wouldn't it be loverly
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Pirate ship Why did the pirate carve a topless mermaid into the front of his ship?', then the trigger 'Yar, cause wouldn't it be loverly' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
My wife is like a Mermaid Below her pelvis, she smells like fish.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'My wife is like a Mermaid', then the trigger 'Below her pelvis, she smells like fish.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
As Sitting Bull said to the mermaid . . . "How?"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'As Sitting Bull said to the mermaid . . .', then the trigger '"How?"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
She swam over to me and told me that she was a magical mermaid and could grant me three wishes.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'She swam over to me and told me that she was a magical mermaid', then the trigger 'and could grant me three wishes.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
submissons by: mermaidamp, ellaweber101
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'submissons by: mermaidamp, ellaweber101', then the trigger 'submissons by: mermaidamp, ellaweber101' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Is your name Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Is your name Ariel?', then the trigger 'Because I think we mermaid for each other!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What is the New Orleans Anthem? "Under the Sea" from the Disney Movie "The Little Mermaid" They made a movie "White Men Can't Jump" in the early 90s. After Katrina they are planning a remake "Black Men Can't Swim".
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What is the New Orleans Anthem? "Under the Sea" from the Disney Movie "The Little Mermaid" They made a movie "White M...', then the trigger 'After Katrina they are planning a remake "Black Men Can't Swim".' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What is the New Orleans Anthem? "Under the Sea" from the Disney Movie "The Little Mermaid"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What is the New Orleans Anthem?', then the trigger '"Under the Sea" from the Disney Movie "The Little Mermaid"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in? A water bed!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in?', then the trigger 'A water bed!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Where can you find a little mermaid? Under the sea!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Where can you find a little mermaid?', then the trigger 'Under the sea!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra? How can someone "draw a blank"?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?', then the trigger 'How can someone "draw a blank"?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Are you a mermaid?, cause your cute as shell.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Are you a mermaid?, cause your', then the trigger 'cute as shell.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Knock Knock Who's there? Suriname! Suriname who? Suriname Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Knock Knock Who's there? Suriname! Suriname who? Suriname Ariel?', then the trigger 'Because I think we mermaid for each other.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
More Topics
Want to understand why these are funny?
Our Comedy Stack Analyzer dissects any joke into its humor mechanism, script opposition, and quality scores.