50+ Dolphin Jokes
Dolphin jokes, smart-sea-life humor, and splashy punchlines.
A man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive sports car. Enraged, the guy hops out and confronts the old man. "Look what you did to my car!" he yells. "You're going to give me $10,000 right now, or I'm going to beat you to a pulp!" "Oh my," says the old man. "I don't have that kind of money. Let me call my son. He trains dolphins, and he will know what to do." "Dolphins?" the other driver huffs while rolling his eyes. The old man pulls out his phone, dials his son, and just as his son answered, the irate man snatches the phone away from the old man. "So you're a dolphin trainer, huh? Well, your old man here just rear-ended my car, and I need 10 grand right now, or I'm going to beat you and your old man to a pulp!" "I'll be there in 10 minutes," says the voice calmly on the other end. Exactly 10 minutes later, a Jeep pulls up, and a guy hops out and proceeds to pulverize the bully, leaving him in a heap on the side of the road. When he finished, he walked over to his father and said, "For the last time, Dad, I train seals. Navy Seals, not dolphins."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive sports car. Enraged, the guy hops out and confronts the old man. "Look wh...', then the trigger 'Navy Seals, not dolphins."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
having sex for pleasure Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'having sex for pleasure Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin.', then the trigger 'I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Yesterday, I swam with a dolphin for hours, we just clicked.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Yesterday, I swam with a dolphin for', then the trigger 'hours, we just clicked.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
If your apartment is hit by a dolphin, DO NOT GO OUT TO SEE IF THE DOLPHIN IS OKAY. That's how the hurricane tricks you into coming outside.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If your apartment is hit by a dolphin, DO NOT GO OUT TO SEE IF THE DOLPHIN IS OKAY.', then the trigger 'That's how the hurricane tricks you into coming outside.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
If a group of dolphins is called a pod and a group of crows is called a murder, what is a group of small children called? Annoying
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If a group of dolphins is called a pod and a group of crows is called a murder, what is a group of small children cal...', then the trigger 'Annoying' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
My wife caught me riding a dolphin. I said it was accidental… …but she swears it was on porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'My wife caught me riding a dolphin. I said it was accidental…', then the trigger '…but she swears it was on porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
SeaWorld was promoting a new gimmick to get folks in the door: camping under the stars with the dolphins. So I bought a ticket... It was a really good experience, for all in tents and porpoises.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'SeaWorld was promoting a new gimmick to get folks in the door: camping under the stars with the dolphins. So I bought...', then the trigger 'It was a really good experience, for all in tents and porpoises.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
If your house it hit by a dolphin, DO NOT GO OUT AND SEE IF THE DOLPHIN IS OKAY. That's how the hurricane tricks you into coming outside.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If your house it hit by a dolphin, DO NOT GO OUT AND SEE IF THE DOLPHIN IS OKAY.', then the trigger 'That's how the hurricane tricks you into coming outside.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
I was sitting on my dolphin, then I fell off. Butt not on porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'I was sitting on my dolphin, then I fell off.', then the trigger 'Butt not on porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A new study of dolphins was recently performed... The study showed that within a few weeks in captivity, they were able to teach humans to stand at the edge of their pool and throw fish at them.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A new study of dolphins was recently performed...', then the trigger 'The study showed that within a few weeks in captivity, they were able to teach humans to stand at the edge of their p...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin... Do you know how many animals I had to screw to find that out?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin...', then the trigger 'Do you know how many animals I had to screw to find that out?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why was the dolphin sad? He had no porpoise in life.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the dolphin sad?', then the trigger 'He had no porpoise in life.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A great storm is brewing.... I was at my neice's pool party last Saturday. She got an inflatable dolphin for her birthday. We were all having a great time, when the wind started blowing a bit harder and some clouds rolled in. Over the next 10 minutes it just started getting windier and windier and the skies turned dark. In the distance we saw a flash of lightning and decided to get the kids inside. As we were running towards the house, my niece dropped the dolphin toy and the wind got ahold of it and blew it across the yard. Fearing it would blow away and be lost forever, i frantically chased after it, but to no avail, it jumped the fence but came to rest in the neighbors rosebush. Some of the thorns had punctured the thin plastic and, upon examination, i saw air escaping through 3 small holes in the side. "Well, I guess that deflates the porpoise."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A great storm is brewing.... I was at my neice's pool party last Saturday. She got an inflatable dolphin for her birt...', then the trigger '"Well, I guess that deflates the porpoise."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A dolphin goes into the bar. The barman says, 'Well, that was a bloody big tsunami!'
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A dolphin goes into the bar.', then the trigger 'The barman says, 'Well, that was a bloody big tsunami!'' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why was the dolphin keeper depressed? Because he had no porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the dolphin keeper depressed?', then the trigger 'Because he had no porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do you call a dolphin that is out of the water? Dolphout
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a dolphin that is out of the water?', then the trigger 'Dolphout' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do philosophical dolphins say? What's the porpoise?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do philosophical dolphins say?', then the trigger 'What's the porpoise?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
I just finished writing a book on dolphins. I should have used paper.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'I just finished writing a book on dolphins.', then the trigger 'I should have used paper.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
My 10 y/o daughter made this joke up on the way to school... What do you get when you cross Hitler with a fish? A-dolphin!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'My 10 y/o daughter made this joke up on the way to school... What do you get when you cross Hitler with a fish?', then the trigger 'A-dolphin!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is meta-humor with incongruity-resolution.
Why was the dolphin depressed? It had no porpoise in life
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the dolphin depressed?', then the trigger 'It had no porpoise in life' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What is Hitler's favourite animal? Adolphin
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What is Hitler's favourite animal?', then the trigger 'Adolphin' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming? He didn't see a porpoise...
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming?', then the trigger 'He didn't see a porpoise...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
A Dolphin meets the Buddha... The Buddha says you may ask me any question young dolphin and I shall answer for you. The Dolphin thinks about what he should ask and after several minutes of soul searching he ask the Buddha "What is my Porpoise in life?"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A Dolphin meets the Buddha... The Buddha says you may ask me any question young dolphin and I shall answer for you.', then the trigger 'The Dolphin thinks about what he should ask and after several minutes of soul searching he ask the Buddha "What is my...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why was the dolphin depressed? He felt he had no porpoise in life
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the dolphin depressed?', then the trigger 'He felt he had no porpoise in life' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you hear about the man who bought a dolphin? He didn't want to live life without a porpoise!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you hear about the man who bought a dolphin?', then the trigger 'He didn't want to live life without a porpoise!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Anybody see that movie about the dog who befriends a dolphin? A Dog's Porpoise
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Anybody see that movie about the dog who befriends a dolphin?', then the trigger 'A Dog's Porpoise' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, try swimming with sharks, because it can cost you an arm and a leg.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, try swimming with sharks, because it can', then the trigger 'cost you an arm and a leg.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
So scientists have invented a way to turn dolphins nearly invisible It's pretty neat, but I don't really see the porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'So scientists have invented a way to turn dolphins nearly invisible', then the trigger 'It's pretty neat, but I don't really see the porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Thought I could put dolphin in my fish pie. Until I noticed I was using all porpoise flour.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Thought I could put dolphin in my fish pie.', then the trigger 'Until I noticed I was using all porpoise flour.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
If Hitler had a pet, what would it be? A dolphin
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If Hitler had a pet, what would it be?', then the trigger 'A dolphin' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Apart from humans, the only animal that enjoys having sex is a dolphin. I had to shag a LOT of animals to find that out.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Apart from humans, the only animal that enjoys having sex is a dolphin.', then the trigger 'I had to shag a LOT of animals to find that out.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Dolphins are the only animals besides humans that enjoy having Sex I had to have sex with a lot of animals to figure that out
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Dolphins are the only animals besides humans that enjoy having Sex', then the trigger 'I had to have sex with a lot of animals to figure that out' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
A marine biologist in Virginia fell afoul of the law over his dolphins. It seems that all he was able to procure were female dolphins. Without males their interest in participating in the experiments waned. Desperate to satisfy his dolphins, he tried to see if any humans could satisfy their needs, but he was limited by morals clauses prohibiting what was in effect bestiality. Unable to find any men in the great state of Virginia to fill this duty (UVA being on break) he was forced to use a somewhat lower form of life: West Virginia coal miners. These men were willing to do the deed, and so he loaded them in a school bus for the trip back to his lab but, of course he was arrested for transporting miners across state lines for immoral porpoises.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'A marine biologist in Virginia fell afoul of the law over his dolphins. It seems that all he was able to procure were...', then the trigger 'These men were willing to do the deed, and so he loaded them in a school bus for the trip back to his lab but, of cou...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the dolphin kill himself? A lack of porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin kill himself?', then the trigger 'A lack of porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What did the depressed dolphin say? I need a porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the depressed dolphin say?', then the trigger 'I need a porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do dolphins use to stay clean? All-porpoise cleaner.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do dolphins use to stay clean?', then the trigger 'All-porpoise cleaner.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What’s the best way to clean a dolphin? Use a multi-porpoise cleaner….. I’ll see myself out
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What’s the best way to clean a dolphin? Use a multi-porpoise cleaner…..', then the trigger 'I’ll see myself out' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you hear about the college for dolphins? It was for educational porpoises only.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you hear about the college for dolphins?', then the trigger 'It was for educational porpoises only.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the dolphin say to the frog? Eeeee eeee eeeee ieeeee eeee eee. Dolphins don't talk dummy.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the dolphin say to the frog? Eeeee eeee eeeee ieeeee eeee eee.', then the trigger 'Dolphins don't talk dummy.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why couldn't the dolphin choose a career? She had no sense of porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why couldn't the dolphin choose a career?', then the trigger 'She had no sense of porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you hear about the man who murdered a dolphin? He was said to have done it on porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you hear about the man who murdered a dolphin?', then the trigger 'He was said to have done it on porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
How do Dolphins live their lives? With a porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'How do Dolphins live their lives?', then the trigger 'With a porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
I never knew how smart Dolphins were... They are so smart that after only a few weeks of captivity they can train humans to stand at the edge of the pool and throw them fish
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'I never knew how smart Dolphins were...', then the trigger 'They are so smart that after only a few weeks of captivity they can train humans to stand at the edge of the pool and...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Something Unusual Cop: "Seen anything unusual?" Me: "A dolphin with a hat, once." Cop: "I mean around here." Me: "Nah - they live in water."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Something Unusual Cop: "Seen anything unusual?" Me: "A dolphin with a hat, once." Cop: "I mean around here."', then the trigger 'Me: "Nah - they live in water."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the dolphin apologize? He didn't do it on porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin apologize?', then the trigger 'He didn't do it on porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
It's a shame what happened to the Dolphins's parents...... I can't imagine being an Orfin
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'It's a shame what happened to the Dolphins's parents......', then the trigger 'I can't imagine being an Orfin' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you see the story about the missing dolphin? I'd tell you more about it but there's really no porpoise...
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you see the story about the missing dolphin?', then the trigger 'I'd tell you more about it but there's really no porpoise...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
My dolphin died... I have no porpoise in life.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'My dolphin died...', then the trigger 'I have no porpoise in life.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the dolphin king say at the funeral of his faithful servant? You have served your porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the dolphin king say at the funeral of his faithful servant?', then the trigger 'You have served your porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why was the scientist allowed to use dolphins for his experiments? Because they were for test porpoise only
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why was the scientist allowed to use dolphins for his experiments?', then the trigger 'Because they were for test porpoise only' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Today i learned that dolphins are the only animals other than humans that enjoy sex! I'm not sure if it was worth getting banned from all those zoo's to find out though
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Today i learned that dolphins are the only animals other than humans that enjoy sex!', then the trigger 'I'm not sure if it was worth getting banned from all those zoo's to find out though' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why couldn't the dolphin turn around in a hallway Because he was driving a tractor
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why couldn't the dolphin turn around in a hallway', then the trigger 'Because he was driving a tractor' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the dolphin run away from home to start a new life? He felt he had lost his sense of porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin run away from home to start a new life?', then the trigger 'He felt he had lost his sense of porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What is a cucumber and a dolphin doing in the same room? Sushi
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What is a cucumber and a dolphin doing in the same room?', then the trigger 'Sushi' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
The Dolphin Joke I once knew a man from Quebec. He was a man of great talent. But too often people with great talent go... unfulfilled. I knew this guy, he went by the name Jaques De Gatineau. Jaques was a great man. He was a thinker, a real smart guy, I guess you could say he was our hope. While I was scrambling to get out of highschool. Jaques De Gatineau, he was accepted to all the best universities and got three degrees. He was going to be the next great. There was Peter Leroux, Wilfred Pasteur, Jerome tsonga, the three wise men of quebec. Jaques De Gatineau was to be the next. But he vanished. So years pass, I started to travel and get around. I traveled from here to there, and to here again. So at one point in my life, I found myself at Sea World. And so I have a guy show me to where the baby dolphins are being feed, cause who doesn't like baby dolphins? And guess who I saw! None other than Jaques De Gatineau! So I walk up to the guy, and I say "Jaques De Gatineau, I feel ashamed for you. You were our hope. You were to go to Canada's capital of Ottawa. We pinned all of Quebec's hopes onto YOU." Now that's a terrible burden, to have a town's hopes pinned on him. So he's feeding these little baby dolphins. And I say "I'm ashamed of you Jaques De Gatineau, you could have done so many great things." And he said "well, I think I'm serving a youthful porpoise."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The Dolphin Joke I once knew a man from Quebec. He was a man of great talent. But too often people with great talent...', then the trigger 'And he said "well, I think I'm serving a youthful porpoise."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Maximum joy at the fish zoo A couple of years ago I traveled to Nigeria you know. Far from the city lights, different world entirely. We went to this big fish zoo, incredible place, sea creatures of all kinds. Amazing experience overall. The thing is, in Nigeria where I was, they’re allowed to keep anything they want in the tanks. No PETA, no regulations, none of that. So I spot this magnificent pale porpoise you know. Almost like a white dolphin but with this enormous smooth head. And she moves through the water with minimum waste. Just gliding around in there. So I ask the fishfella, a Nigerian dude, because I was in Nigeria you know, I ask him: “*So what’s the deal with that white dolphin with the big-ass head?*” And he goes: “*Oh that’s Sadie! She’s a beluga! We named her after Sade the singer! Because we’re in Nigeria!*” I go, “*Ah.*” Seems like a stretch, but alright. Anyway, very enthusiastic guy this fella. He goes on: “*And you see that big smooth upper bulge she’s got there? That’s stored fat. They use it for echolocation you know.*” And I just sort of… stand there. Looking at Sadie. And I say to nobody in particular: “*Huh. Sadie's smooth upper radar.*”
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Maximum joy at the fish zoo A couple of years ago I traveled to Nigeria you know. Far from the city lights, different...', then the trigger 'Sadie's smooth upper radar.*”' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is meta-humor with absurdism.
I have always wanted to swim with dolphins But they keep dying on me during the bus ride to the pool.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'I have always wanted to swim with dolphins', then the trigger 'But they keep dying on me during the bus ride to the pool.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do the dolphins and the post office have in common? Neither deliver on Sundays.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do the dolphins and the post office have in common?', then the trigger 'Neither deliver on Sundays.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you hear about the dolphin who went thru a existential crisis? Turns out, he lost his sense of porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you hear about the dolphin who went thru a existential crisis?', then the trigger 'Turns out, he lost his sense of porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
There was a group of dolphins at a zoo... ...and these dolphins could live forever, but they had to be fed female myna birds. The zookeeper, not wanting to lose his prized dolphins, searched far and wide for these mynas before finally returning to the zoo victorious. When he returned, he found that a bunch of lions had escaped. He called security, and they tranquilized the lions before anyone was hurt. The zookeeper stepped over the sleeping lions, since there was no other way to the dolphin enclosures, but was stopped by one of the security guards. The guard then shouted at the zookeeper, "You're under arrest for transporting female mynas across sedated lions for immortal porpoises!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'There was a group of dolphins at a zoo... ...and these dolphins could live forever, but they had to be fed female myn...', then the trigger 'The guard then shouted at the zookeeper, "You're under arrest for transporting female mynas across sedated lions for...' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What's a Jewish Sharks worst nightmare? Adolphin Hitler
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What's a Jewish Sharks worst nightmare?', then the trigger 'Adolphin Hitler' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What kinds of stories do dolphins tell around the campfire? They're just ghost stories for all in tents and porpoises.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What kinds of stories do dolphins tell around the campfire?', then the trigger 'They're just ghost stories for all in tents and porpoises.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Whats it called when you give a dolphin food for it to do a trick? Squid Pro Quo
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Whats it called when you give a dolphin food for it to do a trick?', then the trigger 'Squid Pro Quo' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What is a Dolphins favorite ingredient? All porpoise flour.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What is a Dolphins favorite ingredient?', then the trigger 'All porpoise flour.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
The Miami Dolphins....
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The Miami Dolphins....', then the trigger 'The Miami Dolphins....' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the dolphin get a fair trial? Because Habeas Porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin get a fair trial?', then the trigger 'Because Habeas Porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the dolphin say when three orcas swam by? Whale, whale, whale, who do we have here? Please, this is a cry for help.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the dolphin say when three orcas swam by? Whale, whale, whale, who do we have here?', then the trigger 'Please, this is a cry for help.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
The Four Foreign Gentlemen An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all watching a dolphin do some excellent tricks. The dolphin notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he jumps higher out of the water and calls out, "Can you all see me now?" And they respond: "Yes." "Oui." "Sí." "Ja."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'The Four Foreign Gentlemen An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all watching a dolphin do some ex...', then the trigger 'And they respond: "Yes." "Oui." "Sí." "Ja."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Have you heard about the Dolphins in Japan that are killing themselves? The scientists think they may be doing it on porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Have you heard about the Dolphins in Japan that are killing themselves?', then the trigger 'The scientists think they may be doing it on porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
What do you call a dolphin with agoraphobia? endorphins
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a dolphin with agoraphobia?', then the trigger 'endorphins' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Even though the Miami Dolphins traded down in the draft... They still got the highest pick.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Even though the Miami Dolphins traded down in the draft...', then the trigger 'They still got the highest pick.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do you call a dolphin that cheats on his girlfriend? A multi-porpoise tool!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a dolphin that cheats on his girlfriend?', then the trigger 'A multi-porpoise tool!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Did you hear about the racist dolphin waiter? He serves no porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Did you hear about the racist dolphin waiter?', then the trigger 'He serves no porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
One day a biologist discovered.. One day a biologist discovered that she'd accidentally bred a strange mutation into the dolphins that she'd been working with. It seemed that they stopped aging entirety, but only if fed a very specific diet of baby seagulls. The research was astounding, but the supply of seagulls rapidly ran out! With only a few hours until the next feeding, desperate measures were necessary. Being far inland, the biologist decides that the easiest way to get the birds will be to steal them from the local zoo. She gets into the zoo easily, but the only way to the bird house is through lion exhibit! Sneaking very carefully, she manages to not wake a single lion. Once the birds were found and stashed in a bag, she snuck back out only to run headlong into the security guard. Needless to say, she ended up in jail, charged with transporting young gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'One day a biologist discovered.. One day a biologist discovered that she'd accidentally bred a strange mutation into...', then the trigger 'Needless to say, she ended up in jail, charged with transporting young gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did one nihilistic dolphin say to the other? "What is life without a porpoise?"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did one nihilistic dolphin say to the other?', then the trigger '"What is life without a porpoise?"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do depressed dolphins without an SO say?" "I have no porpoise in life"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do depressed dolphins without an SO say?"', then the trigger '"I have no porpoise in life"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
So this whale and this herring were inseparable companions ... Anywhere the whale was, all the denizens of the ocean knew they would see the herring near-by. And vice-versa. And then one day, the herring was spotted without the whale - no whale within a hundred miles. So this dolphin asked the herring - where's your pal the whale? And the herring said - How the hell should I know? Am I my blubber's kipper?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'So this whale and this herring were inseparable companions ... Anywhere the whale was, all the denizens of the ocean...', then the trigger 'Am I my blubber's kipper?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
If people were animals who would be the dolphin? The Cubans because they're the strongest swimmers. ...Dogs? Chinese because it's a dog eat dog world. ...Beavers? Mexicans because they're mostly into construction. ...Cockroaches? ISIS because they're still there no matter how many times you bomb the place.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'If people were animals who would be the dolphin? The Cubans because they're the strongest swimmers. ...Dogs? Chinese...', then the trigger 'ISIS because they're still there no matter how many times you bomb the place.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
One dolphin cut another dolphin off at the intersection of Coral Reef and Caribbean Current... The other dolphin said, "Hey, you did that on porpoise!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'One dolphin cut another dolphin off at the intersection of Coral Reef and Caribbean Current...', then the trigger 'The other dolphin said, "Hey, you did that on porpoise!"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What's green and has wheels. A dolphin. I lied about the wheels. I also lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What's green and has wheels. A dolphin. I lied about the wheels. I also lied about it being green.', then the trigger 'I lied about the whole thing.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
When the man saved the dolphin he knew he had found a porpoise
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'When the man saved the dolphin', then the trigger 'he knew he had found a porpoise' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Scientists discover a dolphin that can understand abstract thought Soon everyone from psychologists to religious leaders to philosophers start coming from all over the world to communicate with this animal that is mentality capable of understanding man's most abstract concepts and even able to communicate his ideas back to his teachers. The dolphin really takes to philosophy and is soon grasping the concepts of Aquinas, DeCartes, and Plato with ease. One day his philosophy professor finds the dolphin lost in thought. He's so deep in bought he doesn't even register that the professor is there. The professor asks the dolphin what he's pondering. And the dolphin replies "I'm just wondering what's my porpoise in life."
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Scientists discover a dolphin that can understand abstract thought Soon everyone from psychologists to religious lead...', then the trigger 'And the dolphin replies "I'm just wondering what's my porpoise in life."' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the stoic dolphin say to the whiny whale? Cut out all that blubber and you can be more like me.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the stoic dolphin say to the whiny whale?', then the trigger 'Cut out all that blubber and you can be more like me.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Earlier today, scientists made it official that dolphins are second only to men when it comes to intelligence. So that pushes women further down to third place?
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Earlier today, scientists made it official that dolphins are second only to men when it comes to intelligence.', then the trigger 'So that pushes women further down to third place?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What happened when the shark beat the dolphin in a race? He defeated the porpoise.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What happened when the shark beat the dolphin in a race?', then the trigger 'He defeated the porpoise.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Scientists have been trying to talk to dolphins for years. One day it just clicked.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Scientists have been trying to talk to dolphins for years.', then the trigger 'One day it just clicked.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Why did the dolphin leave his job? [X-post from /r/Jokes3] His coworkers said its because he had a higher porpoise in life.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin leave his job? [X-post from /r/Jokes3]', then the trigger 'His coworkers said its because he had a higher porpoise in life.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What did the dolphin say to the other dolphin after he splashed him? "Hey! You did that on porpoise!"
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What did the dolphin say to the other dolphin after he splashed him? "Hey!', then the trigger 'You did that on porpoise!"' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do you call a happy dolphin? Endorphin
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a happy dolphin?', then the trigger 'Endorphin' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Dolphin Love Dolphin baby: How did you and Mom meet? Dolphin Dad: We met in school. Dolphin Mom: Don’t… Dolphin Dad: And we just clicked
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Dolphin Love Dolphin baby: How did you and Mom meet? Dolphin Dad: We met in school. Dolphin Mom: Don’t…', then the trigger 'Dolphin Dad: And we just clicked' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What does an army of fire ants have in common with a horny dolphin? Both come in waves.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What does an army of fire ants have in common with a horny dolphin?', then the trigger 'Both come in waves.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Hear about all those Japanese people killing dolphins? Apparently they've been doing it on porpoise!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Hear about all those Japanese people killing dolphins?', then the trigger 'Apparently they've been doing it on porpoise!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.
Why did the dolphin commit suicide? Because his life had no porpoise
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Why did the dolphin commit suicide?', then the trigger 'Because his life had no porpoise' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do dolphins like to listen to? Podcasts.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do dolphins like to listen to?', then the trigger 'Podcasts.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Social experiment You curious dolphin.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Social experiment', then the trigger 'You curious dolphin.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What was Hitler's favourite animal? Adolphin.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What was Hitler's favourite animal?', then the trigger 'Adolphin.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink? Serving dual porpoises!
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink?', then the trigger 'Serving dual porpoises!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
My wife is as graceful as a sea mammal in the water What?like a dolphin? No more like a manatees
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'My wife is as graceful as a sea mammal in the water What?like a dolphin?', then the trigger 'No more like a manatees' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
What's Hitler's favorite aquatic animal? A dolphin
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'What's Hitler's favorite aquatic animal?', then the trigger 'A dolphin' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
Researchers Claim To Have Recorded Dolphins Having A "Conversation" . . . . . and turns out, they're racist.
Why is this funny? (Comedy Stack Analysis)
The setup points the reader toward 'Researchers Claim To Have Recorded Dolphins Having A "Conversation" . . . . .', then the trigger 'and turns out, they're racist.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.
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