Dave Chappelle

The setup points the reader toward 'Getting pissed on was the least of my worries at 15. But it keeps coming up.', then the trigger 'There’s a lot of confusion around that age.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”You’re either going to jail for a month or we’ll let you go… ”but you gotta let R.', then the trigger 'Kelly pee on you.” I’m not hesitating.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”Don’t come yet.” Oh, bitch, all these rules! Instead of doing that, why don’t you just tell us where?', then the trigger 'It would make us feel better.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’m plucking all the hair out. I gotta make room, I know this.', then the trigger 'I’m gonna tattoo a gangster-ass face on… with mean expressions, like this.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Staying in the crib tonight. Gotta work on that alibi for a minute. Every black person needs an alibi.', then the trigger 'I do them impromptu joints.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Yeah, thank you very much, miss. ”That’ll be all. ”That’s enough, thanks. Hey, get off of me!', then the trigger '”Whatever happened to lipstick on the collar, lady?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I don’t think he can hear you. Are you ready? Welcome to the show. Here’s Dave Chappelle. Yes, bring it on, man.', then the trigger 'Yes, thank you.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'And I was the only one saying, ”Damn, she wasn’t that smart after all.” Not ’cause she got kidnapped.', then the trigger 'That could happen to anybody.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Why not Usher or somebody like this? So then the kid claims… he goes to Michael’s house.', then the trigger 'This is where it all gets crazy.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'The only people Asian people beef with is other Asian people. Like if you call a Korean guy Chinese. I’ve done this.', then the trigger 'They’ll flip out.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'If you must know… I’m getting Botox done on my balls to get these wrinkles out.', then the trigger 'Finally, to have these just as smooth as eggs.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Son, just stop. It’s all I said. I didn’t wanna say too much.', then the trigger 'Guy’s beating off on the bus, means there’s something wrong with him.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Soon as I check into the hotel: ”Welcome to Disney World, Mr.', then the trigger '”Can we interest you in some Disney dollars?” ”No, man, I’m cool.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Just learn to live with it. That’s all I can tell you. Everybody’s afraid of the police now.', then the trigger 'I’m scared to death of these police.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.

The setup points the reader toward 'These n i g g a s was sitting in front of Starbucks… smoking crack and drinking coffee.', then the trigger 'I said, this is off the hook.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”Oh, I can’t.', then the trigger 'I got AIDS, I know it.” I said, ”You can’t get AIDS from a homeless dude busting a nut on your forehead.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”This was your wish, not mine. ”Thought you were dying in two weeks. What happened to that?', then the trigger '”I’ve been in court for a year-and-a-half.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'If you think that it’s okay to give him life in jail… it should be legal to pee on him.', then the trigger 'That’s all I’m saying.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'He was hanging on the rim… ”and his pants fell down.', then the trigger '”I was checking up close and he was swinging… ”and his butt cheeks might’ve….' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Of course I did it. It’s only 12 quarters.', then the trigger 'Said, ”I’ll break a five for that.” I’ve never seen somebody work this hard for $3.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”Can’t buy weed and pussy with Disney dollars. ”I’m on vacation.” I like them greenbacks.', then the trigger 'I like them greenbacks, you know what I’m saying?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”We’re gonna need you to jerk off another child, Mike. ”I am sorry.', then the trigger '”But, it would really help out.” Or maybe he didn’t, who knows?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I like it when a girl tells me where to come. Don’t like it when she tells me when to come.', then the trigger 'I hate it.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”Hold on, just let me think. Can I think?” You guys have made too much progress too fast.', then the trigger 'Not too much, but you’re just confused.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Like if it makes a man feel like a man… to watch the game, let him sit', then the trigger 'down and watch the game for a minute.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Or how about this? If you’re making love to your man, might as well spice it up, right? How about this?', then the trigger 'I personally like it.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Then I’ll grow the hair back on the bottom, so they got beards like me.', then the trigger 'Then I’m hitting that beach and looking for ball-suckers.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'They want drink. They don’t want all them vitamins, man. They want drink. Sugar, water, purple.', then the trigger 'That’s the ingredients: Sugar, water… and of course, purple.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '”The father of this great nation.', then the trigger 'I’m gonna go shake his hand.” I’d be on the other side like, ”Run, n i g g a!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Kelly even peed on this girl or not… you’re not asking yourself the real question… that', then the trigger 'America needs to decide once and for all.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Somebody broke into my house once. This is a good time to call him. But I went, I don’t know.', then the trigger 'The house is too nice.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'There’s a future in it.” “Oh, that’s it.” Now get out there and be somebody! Go write a book.', then the trigger 'You’re a qualified author now.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’mma tell you that right now. I mean I’d be the first black president.', then the trigger 'I don’t think that nobody would really, really hurt me.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’ve been counting. How many times must I smack you before you act right?', then the trigger '“Ah, Ah, Ah, Ah, Ah, ah, ahhhh…” That’s the thing.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I didn’t know I couldn’t do that.” He said, “that was good, wasn’t it?', then the trigger 'Because I didn’t know I couldn’t do that.” I’m shocked.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'But I couldn’t turn away. For the squeamish, please plug your ears. One of the girls gets so into it.', then the trigger 'There’s no cops around, right?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I feel bad for her. Not even the women feel sorry for her? A little bit, ladies? Now that’s jealousy.', then the trigger 'That’s what that is.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I said, “Mmmm-hmmm!” I like that. He did not hesitate or nothing. You see George Bush Jr.', then the trigger 'He’d be like: (kiss) “Ew.” That was fun.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Mis-ter Pre-si-dent.” “Bitch, my family’s here. Mm-mmm.” Clinton did the same thing, but he didn’t do it like that.', then the trigger 'Because it’s the year 2000.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I don’t even look at their political policies. I just look at their character. You know what I’m saying now?', then the trigger 'You gotta… no, I’m serious.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You’ll be at a club, a bar, right?', then the trigger 'You’re just kicking it with your boys, and a girl walks by, and, man, she looks good.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Don’t know, do you? Now you see that? You see what just happened here?', then the trigger 'Let me tell you something, that is a cultural thing.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'A man’s test in life is a woman. Now by test, I mean that those are the things that we desire.', then the trigger 'Men have nice cars.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Oh my God! That n i g g a was on PCP, Johnson. I had to use necessary force. You saw him.', then the trigger 'No, no paperwork.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Like men aren’t gentlemen anymore? That’s right: Chivalry is dead. And women killed it.', then the trigger 'There’s a fundamental difference in the way we’re gonna see things.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.

The setup points the reader toward 'They called him The Count. Had a cape and everything. You’d have seen him pimping.', then the trigger '“Bitch, where is my money?” You’ve been late four times.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’m afraid to call 911 for anything. If it’s like a fire or anything. Because they tape those phone calls.', then the trigger 'I see the shows.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'News is coming on.” Every week on “60 Minutes,” it was a different girl accusing Clinton. Remember when Kathleen Will...', then the trigger 'She was upset.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I was the only brother on the plane. Well, I thought I was the only brother.', then the trigger 'I looked over, there was one other black dude.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'She leaves me defenseless. I have to do what I have to do.', then the trigger '“David, we need to talk.” “Mah.” “Don’t do that to me, David.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I don’t wanna be… I don’t wanna be single. I don’t like that.', then the trigger 'Sometimes, you go to them single clubs, you see too much.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'But she actually, sorry to tell y’all this, she spreads her buttcheeks open.', then the trigger 'She spreads her buttcheeks open in the middle of a crowded disco.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Doesn’t that seem a little suspicious? Every dead black person in a police van has crack sprinkled on them? Come on,...', then the trigger 'Come on, man.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is benign-violation.

The setup points the reader toward 'He’d be looking around the car… “All right. Get outta here, cracky.” That baby was still standing there, man.', then the trigger 'I was like, “What the… “.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'President, that is not how we do business here, sir.', then the trigger '“Stop sucking the ambassador’s dick.” “No, let him finish.” I will sign the treaty.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You sometimes I’ll be on a business call, right? You know, like, with… with a lawyer or something.', then the trigger 'You know, my lawyers be white.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is superiority.

The setup points the reader toward 'I feel little sorry for her. Don’t y’all feel a little sorry for her at all? Goddamn, y’all, come on now.', then the trigger 'Have a heart.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Good luck.” The only thing in our society that bothers me the most is the way that', then the trigger 'men and women don’t get along no more.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Not in the White House. You hear what I’m saying? The stakes are too high in the White House.', then the trigger 'Can’t have no cokehead president, mm-mmm.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Who get shot and sprinkles crack on themselves? Nobody would do that. I don’t want to leave no mysteries.', then the trigger 'I’m a paranoid guy, you know.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'This is serious. Stop talking in that voice.” “No, see!” I gotta do this, see!', then the trigger 'Seeeee.” I complain, but I’m happy that I’m with somebody.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'And history doesn’t talk about that much. You know why history doesn’t talk about that much?', then the trigger 'Because those two pages in history are stuck together.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’ll tell you that. I’ve been trying to tell brothers that.', then the trigger 'Every group of brothers should have at least one white guy in it.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'He actually just picked a black baby up and kissed him… “Come here, little n i g g a baby.” Mwah!', then the trigger 'Just kissing him.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Oh, I’m sorry, Mr. Right this way. Why didn’t you spread your cheeks when you came in here? Scared of them.', then the trigger 'I’m serious, man.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Sometimes you gotta take the pussy like Pepé. You’re like “No!” Nooo!', then the trigger 'I had to turn the channel real quick.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“Babbo doveva passare da delle gnocche a Las Vegas… “Ho dovuto vendere dei regali per tornare.', then the trigger '“Dove sono i biscotti?” Siete un gran bel pubblico.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Where them cookies at?!” Y’all a great crowd man, you are. Glad y’all came out man. I… I’m nervous, I am.', then the trigger 'Not about this special.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Preferirei ingoiare la lingua che avere un cucchiaio', then the trigger 'per l’eroina in bocca.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You should be able to argue.', then the trigger 'If you have an issue in a relationship, you should be able to argue that issue out, right?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'He was about six-feet-tall I’d say.” “Six-Feet-Tall?” “Yes.', then the trigger 'He had his hat on backwards too.” “Good, that’s good stuff… Hat was on backwards.” “Yes.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Io studio queste cose.', then the trigger 'La cosa importante sulle razze è leggere e vedere un po’ di cose… E viaggiare è sempre una buona cosa.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'It’s comfortable, it’s out in the open. There are no secrets in Mississippi, everybody knows the deal.', then the trigger '“Morning n*gger!” “Morning sir!” Not up here.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Sapete che mi ha detto un amico? Sapete con cosa ha a che fare?', then the trigger 'Il suo padrone di casa è un tossico di crack.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'And I travel, that’s always good. Traveling has made me a racism connoisseur, if you will.', then the trigger 'You know it’s different from region to region.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Poi il procuratore si è stancato della farsa… Ha chiamato gli esperti della scientifica a testimoniare.', then the trigger 'Hanno detto: “Vostro onore, “siamo pronti a testimoniare.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'It was weird, the balls opened up, anyway I… I ran home man, I ran home as fast as I could.', then the trigger 'I was trippin’, trippin’!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I jumped out the chair, half my hair was cut, I didn’t care.', then the trigger 'I didn’t, I just gave the barber a handful of money.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You see ladies, You gotta stick to the f*cking issue. You guys take arguments everywhere just to win ’em.', then the trigger 'That’s why nothing ever gets done.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'That’s worse than fingerprints!', then the trigger 'They find your semen, you’ve been there at least a minute!” But that’s what I want to know, under the stove?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You know I stopped for a minute. I had to see what this was all about. And she noticed.', then the trigger 'She said “what is that?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '– “Chi va in giro con un cucchiaio?” – Beh, gli eroinomani, per farsi la roba.', then the trigger 'Oh, è il cucchiaio che vorresti in bocca.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“Abbiamo trovato sperma dell’imputato… “sotto la stufa.” Ho pensato: “Maledizione!” Altro che impronte digitali.', then the trigger 'Se trovano il tuo sperma, sei stato lì almeno un minuto.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'I’m a racist. I know I’m a racist. You know how I know?', then the trigger '‘Cuz the other day I caught myself being racist against myself.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“Oh, mio Dio! “Che diavolo era? “Sperma!” Ne trovano su ogni scena del crimine. Cosa stava facendo il ladro?', then the trigger '– Abbiamo la merce, filiamocela!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'But it’s a weird place, they got weird morality.', then the trigger 'One time I walked into a titty bar, All these guys are coming in, right?' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'La verità è che sono uscito di casa apposta per vedere delle tette. Non potete giudicarmi, ci sono tette là dentro.', then the trigger 'Gli uomini sono così.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Sembrava che un pene gigante mi stesse tagliando i capelli! Mi sono cagato sotto. Ho iniziato a dirmi: “Dave, calmati.', then the trigger '“È l’effetto della droga.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'HBO Comedy Half Hour Dave Chappelle Ladies and gentlemen, coming to you from San Francisco, please welcome Dave Chapp...', then the trigger 'Thank you, thank you all.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“È un’ottima descrizione: il cappellino – era al contrario… – Sì. – Ed era nero. “Grandi labbra, naso largo, pene cio...', then the trigger 'Signore, non dica altro!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Sono impazzito io o le pubblicità non c’entrano più nulla con il prodotto?', then the trigger 'Fino alla fine non capisco nemmeno di che cazzo stiano parlando.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Down right brutal if you ask me. “I’ll pull her hair!', then the trigger '“I’ll smack her ass!” Poor woman looked like a chicken on a rotisserie!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Because it wasn’t like I was out, “Let me swing by the titty bar.” No, no, I', then the trigger 'left my house specifically to see some tits.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Una volta ho visto un processo su Court TV. È stato imbarazzante.', then the trigger 'Era un caso di abuso sessuale, ma sapevo che l’imputato mentiva, si capiva.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“Tiratemi fuori!” Nella vita… Ci sono troppe stronzate che ti stressano. Tutto il mondo è infestato dalla droga. Dall...', then the trigger 'Odio le droghe.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward '“Wow… Good afternoon, you browse-around but never buy anything suspicious looking n*gger!” After a while that might b...', then the trigger 'You can’t help it.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'You’ll be arguing about the dishes, “Baby, baby, could you wash your dish at least before you', then the trigger 'put it in the sink… “… Premature ejaculator!' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.

The setup points the reader toward 'Dovremmo parlare apertamente e sfogarci un po’… Con dei limiti, però.', then the trigger 'Senza dire tutto ciò che vi passa in mente, sarebbe forse un po’ troppo.' forces a reinterpretation. The main mechanism is incongruity-resolution.